I’ve never been the kind of person to simply hook up, whether it be in friendships or with lovers. I wont pretend that I am virtuous i have had my fair share of make out sessions and frisky moments that never saw the light of day, but i never simply dated for fun. To me its always been about finding a companion, someone to be with me for the rest of my days, as foolish or old fashioned as that may sound. Dating has always been about love to me, and its never been a purely physical experience. My shortest relationship was one month and that was because my boyfriend at the time died rather suddenly, after that I dated my abusive girlfriend for two whole years before I got into a nearly five year old relationship.
Now that I am single friends and co-workers keep urging me to get back in the dating game when i’ve only been single for about a month, first of all if you truly love someone your heart and mind needs time to heal. Second of all thats not who I am, i don’t go out to events looking for a partner, i don’t go to classes wondering if he/she is the one, I don’t look for love. When I am ready I sort of relax and love comes to me.
When I met Ryan i wasn’t looking for him he appeared and together we were for ages. Short term was never in my mind and at the time it wasn’t in his either. When I make a friend I don’t intend to be there friend for a moment i look at it as six months to a year or more. Same thing with dating, i am committed to that one singular person you know?
My peers call me old fashioned, foolish and stupid. I don’t care this is how i am.